There is a person working on your booking call centre today called David; I know nothing about him other than he is Scottish (based on his accent) and has just spent he last 40 min helping me find and book my flights. He has helped me find a sensible, non hell-like, route from Beijing to Lima and (and I hope the rest of you will excuse me for this bit) fly the vast majority of it in first.
David took the time to find various routing options for me and found something which worked - no it isn't the perfect flight, but it appears no carrier actually has the perfect flight; it is the perfect flight which is actually routable.
I hope a manager at BA Customer Services sees this, then finds David and gives him the utterly massive hug that I'd like to give him. His time and help today just made the The Dream come true.
In the off-chance you ever see this... THANK YOU. I fell over myself to say thanks on the phone and I do it again now. You, sir, are a Gentleman and a Scholar, and I thank you.
 - Yes kids, after years and years of saving airmiles (or Avois as BA likes to call them these days) I managed to burn a whole bunch of them and get my flights around the world in first and it not cost a fortune. I'm giggling like a schoolgirl at this.
 - The "cost" of doing this is that I'm flying via London for all of it, which I would have liked to avoid; given what I've got this was the easiest trade of them all. The upside of this is I get a few hours in London to see people, assuming people come to LHR to see me.
 - I have, had, this thing about being out of the country for a whole year. Given what I've booked today I'll take a few hours at LHR T5.